self-reflection

i'm not exactly sure where i'm going with this post, but there are a lot of things i've been thinking about recently in terms of myself and my life and i thought i would write about them here. this semester has been difficult because i've been busy and sick and still dealing with some things that are making life harder, but at the same time i am really enjoying where i'm at right now. most of my classes are on subjects i really love, like modern art, history of photography, art business, and italian, and i think this makes school feel a lot more worthwhile. senior year is exciting because i'm finally figuring out what i'm doing and where i'm going with my life and it feels really good. i've been really discovering what i'm passionate about, and these are exciting things to pursue! i'm working on a lot of things outside of school, like research grants and internship applications and law school preparation (what?!?) and i kind of feel like an adult for the first time.

i've been reflecting on a lot of things in the past couple of weeks. today my art business class met with artist brian kershisnik, and i was reminded of some of his works that i really admire and connect with (constellations and she will find what is lost, above). i think these paintings pretty beautifully illustrate some of the things i've been thinking about. general conference last week was incredible and just what i needed. something i know to be true is that the lord is mindful of us and what we are going through. every time i feel alone or overwhelmed or frustrated or sad, the lord reminds me with some tender mercy that he loves me completely and knows me perfectly. i really encourage you to read or listen to the general conference talks if you have not yet had a chance to, because i promise that they contain personal answers for each of us and they are words the lord wants us to hear. my favorites were elder holland's like a broken vessel and president uchtdorf's you can do it now. i think those are such important messages but we forget them pretty easily sometimes. i am grateful for inspired leaders and a heavenly father who loves us. i'll leave you with these beautiful words from president monson and elder holland:

"that love never changes. it is there for you when you are sad or happy, discouraged or hopeful. god's love is there for you whether or not you feel you deserve it. it is simply always there."

"above all, never lose faith in your father in heaven, who loves you more than you can comprehend."